An English dialogue in the classroom.
A teacher wants their students to give answers to his questions.
Teacher: I think it’s best to get the homework over with first, then we can pick up where we left off last lesson. I thought that this class was more on the ball than Class B but its quite apparent that it’s the other way round I don’t enjoy having a go at you, but your homework was appalling. I think my problem is that I’ve let you all get away with murder during most of the year and now it’s too late to hope that your work will pick up before the exams. Anyway, I’m sorry to fly off the handle at you like this, but something has to be done to get my message across. It makes no odds to me whether you pass your exams or not; it’s entirely up to you. Let’s just run over some of the questions. I’d like the girls to give me their answers to all the odd questions and the boys can handle the even ones.
David: I can’t remember the answers; I’ll just have to make them up if I’m asked.
Teacher: Right, the girl sitting in the third row behind John, what’s your name?
Teacher: Oh yes of course. Barbara, what was your answer to the first question, “Which king came after George III?”
Barbara: George II.
Teacher: Do you know, that’s such a stupid answer I can’t even be bothered to get annoyed. Didn’t you pick up anything in your mathematics classes? I can understand people making the odd mistake but how on earth can George II come after George III?
Jane: Poor Barbara, she’s always being made fun of by the teachers.
Cathy: I can’t get over how slow she is to catch on. What are the odds on her ever getting a question right?
Jane: I’ve no idea, but there doesn’t seem to be anyone she can turn to for help. She’s constantly at odds with her parents, who didn’t take up the headmaster’s invitation to come up to the school to discuss her problems.
Teacher: Jane, instead of talking, perhaps you could give me the correct answer.
Jane: Was it George IV, Sir?
Teacher: Brilliant! But it still doesn’t make up for all the other questions you got wrong. Now who would like to have a go at answering Question 2? David perhaps?
David: How come I always get the difficult ones?
Teacher: How was Queen Victoria related to William IV?
Teacher: Don’t make out you didn’t hear the question. Just have a go.
David: She was his mother.
Teacher: Do you know, this class is driving me up the wall. If Queen Victoria succeeded William IV to the throne, how could she have been his mother?
David: Why do you always pick me up on every little mistake I make?
Teacher: Because you have failed three history papers in a row and the odds are that you’ll fail in the Summer too.
David: I think I’ll get by in life without being a history professor.
Teacher: Well, one thing I can say is that you’re not the odd one out in this class. You’re all as thick as each other!
[The bell rings for break-time]:
Teacher: Let’s call it a day but there are some odd points I’d like to run through next time.